Post by Emmie on Jul 4, 2008 0:30:18 GMT -5
WYNDAM: ESCAPE FROM OLYMPUS
Greetings, gentle viewers! I’m sorry for the delay – I had to give Emmie the slip. She’s really mad that I’m better at telling this epic tale than her. She’s just sick with envy – silly, silly British ma..er, American girl.
Anyways, as you can see I’ve found a new lair which some of you may notice looks a lot like Buffy’s basement. Ha ha! That’s because it IS in fact Buffy’s basement.
What’s that, gentle viewers – you want to know how can I be in Buffy’s basement when all of Sunnydale collapsed into the Hellmouth back in May of 2003? Well, the god of the Buffyverse – Jossus – owed me one for making Seasons 6 and 7 hilarious, plus I fulfilled his geeking out quota in the Buffyverse. So Jossus (praise be!) used his newly mastered powers over time to send me back into the past. Ha! Let’s see Emmie catch me now.
Ahem, so without further adieu allow me to continue the tale of Wyndam the Noob. Last time, Wyndam was being tortured by the Olympian Mods and the brainwashing continues…oh, but first check out these cool covers drawn by my partner in crime, Buffyfanone!
Anyways, as you can see I’ve found a new lair which some of you may notice looks a lot like Buffy’s basement. Ha ha! That’s because it IS in fact Buffy’s basement.
What’s that, gentle viewers – you want to know how can I be in Buffy’s basement when all of Sunnydale collapsed into the Hellmouth back in May of 2003? Well, the god of the Buffyverse – Jossus – owed me one for making Seasons 6 and 7 hilarious, plus I fulfilled his geeking out quota in the Buffyverse. So Jossus (praise be!) used his newly mastered powers over time to send me back into the past. Ha! Let’s see Emmie catch me now.
Ahem, so without further adieu allow me to continue the tale of Wyndam the Noob. Last time, Wyndam was being tortured by the Olympian Mods and the brainwashing continues…oh, but first check out these cool covers drawn by my partner in crime, Buffyfanone!
Aren’t those two covers just the coolest thing ever? Pay no attention to this white board, it’s all old news anyways. Who even cares about hellmouths when the slayers have gone global?
Oh, there’s a few things you should know before I start the tale. First off, we have a mystery narrator – he’s going to be following Wyndam’s journey and all of his lines will be boxed in blue. You might be able to guess who it is if you’re super clever. Second, I’m thinking about adding nametags to all the characters - good idea, bad idea? We just have a very large cast in this epic tale, I’d hate for any noob readers to get confused or lost. Moving on…
And now the dramatic voice over introduction in my best James Earl Jones as Darth Vader voice: Along the path of ascension to Mod, Wyndam is conditioned to assume his responsibilities and tortured to within an inch of his life. Deeming the price and the pain too high, he decides he wants out of the Mod squad and off this frickin' mountain top. Can he escape? Will he survive? And why are there zombies on Mount Olympus?
Clickable Pages 1-5
Clickable Pages 6-10
Clickable Pages 11-14
Uh oh, things do not look good for our fearless heroine. Now, I know what you're thinking, gentle viewers, and I promise you I had nothing to do with putting Emmie in peril. Would my life be easier if she were to magically perish? Most definitely. Would I ever compromise the honesty of my narrative voice to bring this about? No, not at all. Really.
Well, I've gotta run, dear gentle viewers. If I stay in the past for too long I run the risk of my future self meeting my past self. Time paradoxes are tricky creatures...hmm, I wonder how Jossus plans to deal with the whole time paradox issue in Season 8. Until next time -
Found you, you lying liar guy! You thought you could hide from me by running into the past, huh? You didn't count on me calling in a favor from Dark Willow. Get ready to pay, nerdwad!
Step down, girlfriend, you can't just — Ow! Why do you always go for the hair?