Post by lecter on Mar 29, 2008 5:24:37 GMT -5
The fires of judgment burn from the inside
welling up and making me want to burst,
to explode and take the whole fucking world with me.
From inside come the fires, no one's judging me but me,
I know this.
I see in all your faces that you don't judge, you just help
but I can't help it, I see my own terror and guilt
reflected back to me in your helpful, caring eyes.
I want to claw at my skin, my eyes, my face.
I want to rip and tear and break out and fly away.
But I won't
I want to curl up in a corner and cry, cry until I waste into nothing
and become the blank black emptiness I feel inside right now.
But I won't.
I want to scream and rage and let my storm fall on you,
to let it leave me and let you deal with it so I don't have to.
But I won't
What I will do is ignore the fire, the rage, the tearing.
I'll carry on, I'll cling to your love because it's my only lifeline
I'll cling like I've ne'er clung to anything before,
I'll try not to cling too tight and strangle us all.
I'll carry on trying to answer the question
until it sinks into my thick skull that our purpose here
is not to answer the question, just to live it.
These fires hurt me, they burn me, they damn near destroy me.
But they will never control me.
I'm broken in two by this and I give myself, completely, to you.
Fix me if you can, but I won't rely on it.
All I want, is love.
These fires can never go out, I know that.
They can be calmed,
as they are in the moments I spend with you.
My mistakes are so many, clustered, grinning with bared teeth
mocking the faith I put in you, telling me I'm a fool,
a damned fool who'll burn for this trust.
But trust I do.
Is my trust ill placed? If you say nay then trust you I shall,
because trust you I do.
The problem with judging yourself,
is you never live up to your own expectations.
These fires, the fires of judgment, burn on and on.
I have fallen apart.
All that remains to be seen is:
Can I be put together again, or shall I remain thus.
What the future holds I cannot imagine,
but of this I can be certain:
An era has ended, and a new chapter is about to begin.
I will do all it is within my power to do
to ensure this next chapter will run better than the one that ends with this small, insignificant piece of writing.
So this is,
The End.
welling up and making me want to burst,
to explode and take the whole fucking world with me.
From inside come the fires, no one's judging me but me,
I know this.
I see in all your faces that you don't judge, you just help
but I can't help it, I see my own terror and guilt
reflected back to me in your helpful, caring eyes.
I want to claw at my skin, my eyes, my face.
I want to rip and tear and break out and fly away.
But I won't
I want to curl up in a corner and cry, cry until I waste into nothing
and become the blank black emptiness I feel inside right now.
But I won't.
I want to scream and rage and let my storm fall on you,
to let it leave me and let you deal with it so I don't have to.
But I won't
What I will do is ignore the fire, the rage, the tearing.
I'll carry on, I'll cling to your love because it's my only lifeline
I'll cling like I've ne'er clung to anything before,
I'll try not to cling too tight and strangle us all.
I'll carry on trying to answer the question
until it sinks into my thick skull that our purpose here
is not to answer the question, just to live it.
These fires hurt me, they burn me, they damn near destroy me.
But they will never control me.
I'm broken in two by this and I give myself, completely, to you.
Fix me if you can, but I won't rely on it.
All I want, is love.
These fires can never go out, I know that.
They can be calmed,
as they are in the moments I spend with you.
My mistakes are so many, clustered, grinning with bared teeth
mocking the faith I put in you, telling me I'm a fool,
a damned fool who'll burn for this trust.
But trust I do.
Is my trust ill placed? If you say nay then trust you I shall,
because trust you I do.
The problem with judging yourself,
is you never live up to your own expectations.
These fires, the fires of judgment, burn on and on.
I have fallen apart.
All that remains to be seen is:
Can I be put together again, or shall I remain thus.
What the future holds I cannot imagine,
but of this I can be certain:
An era has ended, and a new chapter is about to begin.
I will do all it is within my power to do
to ensure this next chapter will run better than the one that ends with this small, insignificant piece of writing.
So this is,
The End.
_________________________________________________
This is one of my newest poems, as far as structure goes it... well it doesn't have any. Honestly isn't the best form of poetry.
On a side note, I also write songs. Can anyone tell me if I can post songs on here too?