Post by AngelFaith on Mar 29, 2010 21:06:35 GMT -5
Now it’s no secret that I can’t stand the Spike/Buffy relationship. That said, I do find the relationship fascinating – the dynamics, the abuse and the aftermath of Spike getting his soul back.
Now I might hate Spike and Buffy together but I do believe that Spike did love her. Yeah, before he got his soul it was an obsessive very unhealthy love, but it was love all the same. And that is what I believe motivated him to do all the “good” that he did. I mean, the chip in his brain prevented him from killing, so he needed to get his yayas somehow. Beating up on demons seems a good way to get his violence in. But all the other good he does – protecting Dawn etc., is driven purely by his obsession with Buffy. After Glory tortures him to get information on the key, Spike confesses to Buffy (posing as the Bot) that he did it because losing Dawn would tear Buffy apart. Notice that he doesn’t say that he did it for Dawn – it was for Buffy.
Their sexual relationship in Season 6 is what fascinates and repulses me the most. It is such a horrendous relationship – they abuse one another, tear each other down, f*** each other (it cannot be described in any other way) senseless and keep coming back for more. What they do together obviously repulses Buffy – she confesses to Tara how disgusted she is with herself, how much she hates herself and Spike for it, but on some level she does need him. She keeps coming back. I think that she does feel for him as well but that it is nothing on what she will come to feel for him in Season 7. She needs him on a basic level, to feel alive, to feel anything, but this leaves her feeling empty and full of self-loathing and at the same time she hates him as well. It is obviously not healthy and she takes her hatred out on Spike, the same way he takes his hatred out on her. The whole relationship is degrading, horrendous and damaging to both of them.
I can’t write about Spike and Buffy without mentioning the attempted rape. I know that Spike didn’t have a soul, but I can’t ignore the fact that Spike loved Buffy when he did this to her. The Spuffy’s like to go on about how Spike did good even without a soul but when it comes to the attempted rape they fall back on the whole “Spike didn’t have a soul” defence. What’s interesting is that of all of Spike’s crimes, attempting to rape Buffy is perhaps the most human of all of them. The attempted rape is one of the main reasons I hate the Spike/Buffy relationship. I find it unforgiveable and it probably forever had an effect on Buffy. I doubt, no matter what her feelings for Spike were, that she would ever be able to have a sexual relationship with him again.
Now, I do believe that Buffy developed feelings for Spike as early as Season 6. As I said before, as much as she hates herself for sleeping with him, she does need him on some sort of level. I think after he got his soul back she began to trust him again and by the end of Season 7 she cared for and needed him. I don’t believe that she was in love with him – Spike himself didn’t believe it, shown by what he said in Chosen “No you don’t. But thanks for saying it.” Buffy’s look after he says this seems to confirm it.
Ultimately, even though there were real feelings there in the end, so much of their relationship was caught up in violence, abuse and hatred that it’s hard to understand how it was sustained. In the end I don’t think they could ever be together but I think Buffy will always feel something, no matter how small, for Spike.
Now I might hate Spike and Buffy together but I do believe that Spike did love her. Yeah, before he got his soul it was an obsessive very unhealthy love, but it was love all the same. And that is what I believe motivated him to do all the “good” that he did. I mean, the chip in his brain prevented him from killing, so he needed to get his yayas somehow. Beating up on demons seems a good way to get his violence in. But all the other good he does – protecting Dawn etc., is driven purely by his obsession with Buffy. After Glory tortures him to get information on the key, Spike confesses to Buffy (posing as the Bot) that he did it because losing Dawn would tear Buffy apart. Notice that he doesn’t say that he did it for Dawn – it was for Buffy.
Their sexual relationship in Season 6 is what fascinates and repulses me the most. It is such a horrendous relationship – they abuse one another, tear each other down, f*** each other (it cannot be described in any other way) senseless and keep coming back for more. What they do together obviously repulses Buffy – she confesses to Tara how disgusted she is with herself, how much she hates herself and Spike for it, but on some level she does need him. She keeps coming back. I think that she does feel for him as well but that it is nothing on what she will come to feel for him in Season 7. She needs him on a basic level, to feel alive, to feel anything, but this leaves her feeling empty and full of self-loathing and at the same time she hates him as well. It is obviously not healthy and she takes her hatred out on Spike, the same way he takes his hatred out on her. The whole relationship is degrading, horrendous and damaging to both of them.
I can’t write about Spike and Buffy without mentioning the attempted rape. I know that Spike didn’t have a soul, but I can’t ignore the fact that Spike loved Buffy when he did this to her. The Spuffy’s like to go on about how Spike did good even without a soul but when it comes to the attempted rape they fall back on the whole “Spike didn’t have a soul” defence. What’s interesting is that of all of Spike’s crimes, attempting to rape Buffy is perhaps the most human of all of them. The attempted rape is one of the main reasons I hate the Spike/Buffy relationship. I find it unforgiveable and it probably forever had an effect on Buffy. I doubt, no matter what her feelings for Spike were, that she would ever be able to have a sexual relationship with him again.
Now, I do believe that Buffy developed feelings for Spike as early as Season 6. As I said before, as much as she hates herself for sleeping with him, she does need him on some sort of level. I think after he got his soul back she began to trust him again and by the end of Season 7 she cared for and needed him. I don’t believe that she was in love with him – Spike himself didn’t believe it, shown by what he said in Chosen “No you don’t. But thanks for saying it.” Buffy’s look after he says this seems to confirm it.
Ultimately, even though there were real feelings there in the end, so much of their relationship was caught up in violence, abuse and hatred that it’s hard to understand how it was sustained. In the end I don’t think they could ever be together but I think Buffy will always feel something, no matter how small, for Spike.
This is for good and bad and it's always been that way. They also have the potential to be good friends because they understand something about the other that no one else does. No Buffy will never be in love with Spike because he's not the type she can feel that way about. But I do think she developed real affection for him and I think there is always a part of her that respected him on a level she didn't want to admit. She wouldn't have trusted him to have done a lot of what she left him to do if she hadn't. I love the way Spike feels about Buffy and I think it has brought out the worst in him but it most often brings out the absolute best in him. Buffy made Spike the hero he always needed to be. The sad thing to me is, I'm not sure Buffy will ever appreciate it. I am also unsure of whether I can blame her or not. 
He's smart, he's honest, he loves very deeply and he's got the best sense of self of anybody in the whole show. Angel hates himself but Spike loves himself. Does anybody else in all of Buffy or Angel love themselves?