Post by Faith5byFive on Apr 5, 2010 14:36:17 GMT -5
"Faith" she screams out "Yes Mamma", "I thought i told you to clean that godamn mess up", "Im sorry mamma but i was just ...." im cut short by a smack across my face, i fall to the floor sobbing and shaking in fear. "Your useless!, nothing a piece of crap thats all your good for is crying! your a pathetic worthless whore! i should of got rid of you as soon as your slithered out of me" she roars throwing things around the room. "Mamma please" i try to reason with her. I wish she'd love me but i can smell the alcohol on her breath as she grabs me. "A worthless whore is what your are and you'll never be anything more than that"
I sit up instantly from the nightmare. He brushes the dark curls off my face.
"Faiths its okay, everythings fine go back to sleep" he tells me with a reassuring voice.
Im so tired i quickly fall back into the darkness.
"Faith no!" B yells out but it's too late for me and too late for him. Iv'e killed a man.
She tries to help me bring me back from it but im too far gone. So i screw her.
Everybody wishes i could be more like Buffy but im not im better, and she knows it thats why she hates me.
"Faith you've killed a man" she says standing as still as the grave.
"I don't care" is my blunt reply
"Angel?" panic is sweeping over me, he runs back into the bedroom. "Im here your okay, i promise"
I try to hold back the tears. His huge arms cover my body as he pulls me in tighter. He places a gentle kiss on my head, and rocks me until i fall back to sleep.
He wont hit me why wont he hit me, I swing my fist into his face he just shouts at me. "Im not going to make it easy for your Faith i wont do it!" I bring my leg up and connect with his chin. I try to swing another punch but feel myself breaking down "Kill me Angel im bad do you hear me im bad!" i scream. The rains mixxed in with my tears now. "Im bad do you hear me, just do it, just kill me....please just kill me"
He's stopped me from hitting him now i try to wriggle free but can't his arms are over me as we fall to the floor. Im shaking and crying and he's there telling me everythings going to be okay but nothings ever going to be okay ever again.
Angel's fast asleep. I stand up from the bed i can't fall back to sleep because when i do im plagued by the nightmares sometimes its just voices but other times it's as if im reliving it. I stroll over to the sink to get a glass of water. But the voices haunt me.
"Faith no!"
"I don't care B"
"Just kill me im bad im evil do you hear me?"
"Faith you've killed a man"
"Your'e nothing, a worthless whore!"
To many voices are filling my head. I drop the glass and fall to the floor.
"SHUT UP, JUST SHUT UP"
Angels rushing towards me i try to push him away but iv'e lost the strength to fight.
"Faith! your fine it's just a nightmare"
"No Angel your'e wrong my lifes the nightmare" he stares at me for a second then picks me up like a child.
Tears are coming from my eyes now so much pain and suffering and it's never going to end.
I sit up instantly from the nightmare. He brushes the dark curls off my face.
"Faiths its okay, everythings fine go back to sleep" he tells me with a reassuring voice.
Im so tired i quickly fall back into the darkness.
"Faith no!" B yells out but it's too late for me and too late for him. Iv'e killed a man.
She tries to help me bring me back from it but im too far gone. So i screw her.
Everybody wishes i could be more like Buffy but im not im better, and she knows it thats why she hates me.
"Faith you've killed a man" she says standing as still as the grave.
"I don't care" is my blunt reply
"Angel?" panic is sweeping over me, he runs back into the bedroom. "Im here your okay, i promise"
I try to hold back the tears. His huge arms cover my body as he pulls me in tighter. He places a gentle kiss on my head, and rocks me until i fall back to sleep.
He wont hit me why wont he hit me, I swing my fist into his face he just shouts at me. "Im not going to make it easy for your Faith i wont do it!" I bring my leg up and connect with his chin. I try to swing another punch but feel myself breaking down "Kill me Angel im bad do you hear me im bad!" i scream. The rains mixxed in with my tears now. "Im bad do you hear me, just do it, just kill me....please just kill me"
He's stopped me from hitting him now i try to wriggle free but can't his arms are over me as we fall to the floor. Im shaking and crying and he's there telling me everythings going to be okay but nothings ever going to be okay ever again.
Angel's fast asleep. I stand up from the bed i can't fall back to sleep because when i do im plagued by the nightmares sometimes its just voices but other times it's as if im reliving it. I stroll over to the sink to get a glass of water. But the voices haunt me.
"Faith no!"
"I don't care B"
"Just kill me im bad im evil do you hear me?"
"Faith you've killed a man"
"Your'e nothing, a worthless whore!"
To many voices are filling my head. I drop the glass and fall to the floor.
"SHUT UP, JUST SHUT UP"
Angels rushing towards me i try to push him away but iv'e lost the strength to fight.
"Faith! your fine it's just a nightmare"
"No Angel your'e wrong my lifes the nightmare" he stares at me for a second then picks me up like a child.
Tears are coming from my eyes now so much pain and suffering and it's never going to end.