Today I Was Blindsighted

[AngelFaith]

My boyfriend broke up with me. Completely out of the blue. I thought we were doing fine, we've been up and down and on and off for the past four years, but things were finally getting better, my mental health is almost back up to 100% (it was one of our main issues) and then out of the blue - BAM! He's all "I can't do this anymore."

I feel awful. Part of me is thinking we'll probably sort it out, but a tiny part of me is scared that he's gone forever. I doubt it, but it's possible.

I'm miserable. Still haven't cried, but I did chain-smoke my way through half a pack of smokes while bitching to my best friend.

Boys suck. (Sorry, it's a bit of an unfair generalization, but I can't help it right now.)

[Billie Erin]

^^^I'm so sorry AngelFaith, but I guess if he's serious about you then he'll come back and if he doesn't then he was probably just an obstacle on your journey to finding Mr Right anyway. Boys can be quite insensitive sometimes. It may be worth asking him to explain his reasons, to make him question the real validity of his motives.

[AngelFaith]

Thanks Billie, I'm going to try and talk to him today, but if he really wants to go I can't force him to stay.

[Hellbound Hyperion]

Boys suck. (Sorry, it's a bit of an unfair generalization, but I can't help it right now.)

The opposite (or same!) sex invariably sucks after break-ups. It's okay. Let us know how that talk goes, we're here for ya!

[drusillacakes]

Dang, I'm so sorry AngelFaith. That sucks! Hope he's willing to talk it out with you. At least give you a reason! Although I don't know if that would make it any less painful.

[TabulaRasa]

Jun 20, 2010 7:19:01 GMT -5 AngelFaith said:

Boys suck. (Sorry, it's a bit of an unfair generalization, but I can't help it right now.)

This is a completely true statement.
Sorry boys but she's right.

And I'm sure everything will work out, if it never had a shot it would have never have been on-and-off to begin with.

[The Girl In Question]

I wish I could do something about this AngelFaith! For now I'll just hate him for you so you don't have to. Like what Willow did for Buffy in "As you Were."

[elenasaur]

Aw, that really sucks AngelFaith. His loss, definitely.

[AngelFaith]

Thanks for all the support guys. Unhappy to report that things have gotten worse.

When he broke up with me on Sunday we were visiting Canberra (our old home city). He dropped me off at my parents' place and I asked him to please call me on Monday so we could figure out who would go back Cooma (our current town) etc.

Monday rolls around and no call. I tried calling him, but no answer. Finally I booked myself a bus back, figuring he would call me when he figured out what was going on. I go back to my house, walk in, and find that he's driven up, gotten all of his stuff (including the fridge and the washing machine) left my stuff all over the floor and the bed and left! No call, not note or anything.

I was heartbroken. He basically abandoned me in a strange town I'm not used to, where I have no family and no really close friends. I also have no money and no idea what to do next.

I am so mad, and upset and humiliated, and the worst part is that I still love him like crazy and miss him like hell.

I'm just so conflicted and confused. Everything sucks. I repeat, boys SUCK!

[Billie Erin]

^^^This guy sounds like such a jerk, may the fleas of a thousand goats infest his armpits(that's my favourite insult, see- he must be really terrible for me to use my favourite insult on him). I am actually fuming mad at this guy and I've never met him.

I guess your first step now should be to call a close friend or relative and get home, get your things sorted and start re-building your life without him. I'd actually recommend throwing out/ selling anything he gave you or that reminds you of him because you want to cleanse your life of him now, no matter how much you may still care for him you have to realise that you love yourself more than him and that he isn't worth your time. Yes, so get back home would be my first advice. Don't try to contact him again, all it willdo is give him the satisfaction of knowing he still has power over you, just try to ignore any memories of him until you move on. Which may be a while I'm afraid- but time is the only real cure.

I'm so sorry that all this has happened to you. This jerk just seems horrid.

[Skytteflickan88]

What a bastard.

How do you mean, you have no money? Did you guys share rent, and he left you without any pay? Sounds like a episode on Judge Judy.

I hope he was hurting too much to think about the consequences. Otherwise, I second Billie Erin's insult/curse. Let there be fleas. Hungry fleas.

[AngelFaith]

You guys are so sweet, the fleas insult is particularly awesome.

The reason I'm broke is because my last pay went towards the rent and I haven't had a shift since. Found out today that my boss confused the dates I was supposed to leave and has replaced me, so now I have no job either.

I've spent the last couple of days formulating plans, calling friends and organising the house so that I can move back to Canberra as soon as possible. I'm on track, but every time I stop, even for a second, everything hits me all over again.

I finally talked to him, he apologised for what he did (and basically admitted that his parents pushed him to do it) but it doesn't fix anything. I'm seeing him tomorrow, so hopefully we can sort some stuff out. I still don't know if he truly wants out of this relationship.

Thanks for all the support guys. I'm holding up (just barely) and I WILL get through this, it's just been a horrible, horrible few days.

[drusillacakes]

GO you. I'm so proud of you for staying so strong through all of this. What a craptastic jerk of him to do this to you!? I mean, the more you describe the situation, the angrier I get. Frankly, I still don't understand how his parents could have pushed him to do it as there are more civil ways to break up with someone, and abandoning them in a strange town, ransacking the house of their belongings and then leaving without a trace just seems like an incredibly immature thing to do.
(I will be sending mental bitca-slappings in his direction... )

I'm so sorry to hear about your job situation though-- any chance your boss will be understanding and find some shifts for you? Maybe there's a co-worker who needs time off and you can cover? Either way, I hope everything will get better once you get home. And it's good that you have friends you can count on to help you through this.

[AngelFaith]

Well, things are slowly getting better.

I'm moving back to Canberra on Monday and a friend of mine is letting me rent an apartment he owns cheap, so that's a huge weight off my mind.

Also talked to the boy in person today, he apologised again for what he pulled on Monday and we got some things sorted out. We're going to stay in touch via Facebook and text messages for the next few weeks, but not have any face-to-face contact. After that we'll see where we're both at and take the next step, whatever that may be.

Thanks again for all the support guys. You're all wonderful and make me feel cared for and special. Luv ya all!

[The Night Lord]

Well, that's good, as long as you've got everything (or most things) sorted out. Hope it all goes well, AF. We're here for you

[Billie Erin]

It's really good that you've sorted all this out well done for being strong.

I must admit I don't know him or you or anything about your relationship so you can ignore this next comment if you want to but if it were me I don't think I would give him a second chance. If he's willing to let other people come first like this now and push him to hurt you then he could do it again in the future and that doesn't make him a very good life partner in my eyes. But that's just my personal opinion from my experience. You have to do what you think's best.

[whitecandy]

Sending lots and lots of hugs and good thoughts your way AngelFaith, how awful for him to do this to you, you deserve so much better. I hope your move home goes well and you start to feel a bit happier soon. I am also praying for fleas

[The Girl In Question]

I hope this makes you laugh, AngelFaith! But if it somehow offends you, I'm sorry ):

theoatmeal.com/comics/bacon_love

[AngelFaith]

Thanks TGIQ, that did make me laugh! You guys are awesome. I'm all moved back to Canberra (or close enough) and i have a job interview tomorrow. Things are slowly falling into place.

[Billie Erin]

^^^That's really awesome AngelFaith! Good luck with the interview!