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Post by SlayerLV on Apr 15, 2007 23:11:34 GMT -5
Buffy: Giles, are you sure about this? Giles: Why wouldn't I be? Buffy: Well, aside from the fact that most magic shop owners in Sunnydale have the life expectancy of a Spinal Tap drummer ... and, have you ever run a store before? Giles: I was a librarian for years. This is exactly the same, except people pay for the things they never return. It'll give me focus. Increase my resources. And it'll prevent you lot from trampling all over my flat at all hours. There may even be some space for you to train in the back. Buffy: Boy, you've really thought this through. How bored were you last year? Giles: I watched Passions with Spike. Let us never speak of it.
NEXT: The Replacement
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Post by Jsebold87 on Apr 16, 2007 0:03:56 GMT -5
Anya: Well, maybe we shouldn't do this reintegration thing right away. See, I can take the boys home, and ... we can all have sex together, and ... you know, just slap 'em back together in the morning. Xander #1: She's joking. Xander #2: No she's not! She entirely wants to have sex with us together. Which is ... wrong, and, and it would be very confusing. Giles: (getting up from the floor) Uh, uh, we just need to light the candles. Also, we should continue to pretend we heard none of the disturbing sex talk. Willow: Check. Candles and pretense.
Next: Out of My Mind
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Melissa
Rogue Demon Hunter
I'm gonna be a fireman when the floods roll back.[Mo0:16]
Posts: 428
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Post by Melissa on Apr 16, 2007 2:51:31 GMT -5
Buffy: Spike, I just saw you taste your own nose blood. You know what? I'm too grossed out to hear anything you have to say. Go home. Spike: It's blood. It's what I do!
Next: No Place Like Home
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Post by Jsebold87 on Apr 16, 2007 4:54:49 GMT -5
Willow carries the hourglass over to Anya, the wrapping paper hanging off it. Willow: Does this look right to you? Anya: Sure, if you wrapped it with your feet.
Next: Family
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Post by chosenprophecy on Apr 16, 2007 5:30:08 GMT -5
I couldn't choose between two xD Giles: "You can't be more specific about what she's like?" Buffy: "She was kind of like Cordelia, actually. I'm pretty sure she dyes her hair." Giles: "Ah, yes, that one, of course. Our work is done."
Buffy: "Besides, Melinda's a bad influence. I don't like you hanging out with someone that... short."
Next: Fool for love
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Post by Jsebold87 on Apr 16, 2007 11:17:21 GMT -5
Spike: I haven't said a word about the bloody Slayer since we left California. She's on the other side of the planet, Dru! Drusilla: But you're lying! I can still see her floating all around you, laughing. Why? Why won't you push her away? Spike: But I did, pet. I did it for you. You keep punishing me. Carrying on with creatures like this. Chaos Demon: Okay, you guys obviously have a thing going on here. Drusilla: I have to find my pleasures, Spike. You taste like ashes.
Next: Shadow
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Post by hitnrun017 on Apr 16, 2007 11:20:03 GMT -5
Harmony: Stop! Think! The second you even point that thing at her your gunna be all "ARRRG", and then you'll get biatched slapped up and down Main Street until she's had enough and just stakes you!
Next: Shadow
Haha, you can't say the B word?
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drufan
Initiative Soldier
Posts: 396
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Post by drufan on Apr 16, 2007 13:03:15 GMT -5
ANYA: HEY!! GILES: Anya, your heys are startling the customers. XANDER: And-and pretty much the state. ANYA: You sold someone a Khul's amulet and a Sobekian bloodstone. GILES: Yes, I believe I did. ANYA: Are you stupid or something? GILES: Allow me to answer that question with a firing. XANDER: She's kidding! An, we talked about the employee-employer vocabulary no-nos. That was number five.
Next: Listening to Fear
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Post by Jsebold87 on Apr 16, 2007 16:26:36 GMT -5
WILLOW: We're doing World War One now. The last exam was really pretty easy, just underlying causes and trench foot. So it should be no hassle to make it up- BUFFY: (sighs) I don't even know if I'm gonna take that exam. JOYCE: (scowling) I'd rip it in half and stick it in bed with me!
Next: Into the Woods
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Post by buffyfannumerouno on Apr 16, 2007 16:47:38 GMT -5
For this episode there were so many funny ones from ANYA mostly so I decided to list a bunch of them:
Dawn: When I was younger, I used to put my chopsticks in my mouth like this, and then Buffy would chase me around the house yelling, "I am the Slayer! I'm going to get you!" Anya: That's disturbing. You're emotionally scarred and will end up badly.
Anya: Well, we could play that game again - Life? That was fun. Dawn: For you. You always win. Anya: Well... we can make a wager this time. You can give me real money. That would be different. Xander (sarcastically): And after we teach her to gamble, maybe we can all get drunk! Anya: I don't think the bar would serve her, but we could bring something in. (To Dawn) Strawberry schnapps tastes just like real ice cream.
Anya: We have to see the chimp playing hockey! That's hilarious! The ice is so slippery, and, and monkeys are all irrational. We have to see this!
Dawn: It's okay. You guys don't have to make a big deal for me. I'm only sleeping over here so Buffy and Riley can boink. Xander: No, no, that's not it at all, they just need time to, um, be tender. Relax. Anya: He's not very convincing is he?
Dawn: "Alone time" always translates into "get Dawn out of the house so we can have loud obnoxious sex." Anya (softly to Xander): Oh, does that mean we can't?
Anya: Who ordered more chickens' feet? The ones we have aren't moving at all. Xander: That's generally what happens when you cut them off the chicken. Anya: I'm serious! Maybe we could do a... holiday promotion. One free with every purchase! Giles: Oh, yeah. Dear holiday memories. Merry tykes by the fire, enjoying their new Christmas... chicken feet. Willow: Aw, holding them tight as they fall asleep. Painting their little toenails. Anya: That's very humorous. Make fun of the ex-demon! I can just hear you in private. "I dislike that Anya. She's newly human and strangely literal." Willow: Anya, I don't say that! No one says that. No one talks that way. Anya: There's nothing wrong with my idea anyway. I've been very good for this store. If it wasn't for me, Giles would be a terrified old man staring at a quarterly tax statement and wetting himself. Giles: I say, that's an exaggeration! Willow: Anya, you've helped out a lot, but I have too. Anya: Yes, I forgot about all the vigorous sitting around. Xander: Anya, you can back off a little. You get paid. Willow's doing this on her own time. Anya: I'm sorry, Willow. Thank you for making time in your busy life to come in here and get in the way of mine. Xander: Anya, play nice. Anya: You know, fine, take her side instead of mine even though I'm the one who sleeps with you and feeds you, bathes you... Willow: She bathes you? Xander: Only in an erotic, Penthouse-y way, not in a sponge-bath-y geriatric sort ofโ Giles: Please! Stop, I beg of you.
Next: Triangle
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Post by hitnrun017 on Apr 16, 2007 16:57:10 GMT -5
Willow: There's a troll on the loose and you're gunna crash Giles' car! Anya: It's likely, we're going very fast.
Next: Checkpoint
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drufan
Initiative Soldier
Posts: 396
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Post by drufan on Apr 16, 2007 18:30:23 GMT -5
At Spike's Crypt:
JOYCE: I, I love what you've, um, neglected to do with the place. SPIKE: Just don't break anything. (goes to turn on the TV) And don't make a lot of noise. Passions is coming on. JOYCE: (comes forward) Passions? Oh, do you think Timmy's really dead? SPIKE: Oh! (gestures to his armchair. He and Joyce each sit on one arm) No, no, she can just sew him back together. He's a doll, for god's sake. JOYCE: Uh, what about the wedding? I mean, there's no way they're gonna go through with that.
Next: Blood Ties
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Melissa
Rogue Demon Hunter
I'm gonna be a fireman when the floods roll back.[Mo0:16]
Posts: 428
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Post by Melissa on Apr 17, 2007 1:08:49 GMT -5
Anya (holding the frilly dress Buffy received): Oh, it's just so lovely! Ooh, I wish it was mine! (The group gives her a funny look.) Oh, like you weren't all thinking the same thing! Giles: I'm fairly certain I wasn't. (whispers to Xander) I've got one just like it.
Next: Crush
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Post by Jsebold87 on Apr 17, 2007 3:07:47 GMT -5
Harmony: And you can say good-bye to this (pointing at her butt) because you're not gonna see it any more ever. (thinks) Unless you run into me somewhere and it's me walking away from you. She starts to leave, stops and turns back, putting hands on her hips. Harmony: But even then ... I'll probably just ... you know ... back away.
Next: I Was Made To Love You
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drufan
Initiative Soldier
Posts: 396
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Post by drufan on Apr 17, 2007 11:07:16 GMT -5
TARA: Willow's good at all that computer stuff, but me not so much. Do you really understand all that? ANYA: Oh. Well, at first it was confusing. Just the idea of computers was like, "whoa, I'm eleven hundred years old. I had trouble adjusting to the idea of Lutherans."
Cracked me up, (mainly 'cause I'm Lutheran).
Next: The Body
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Post by hitnrun017 on Apr 17, 2007 13:10:59 GMT -5
Giles holding some kind of alcohol
Giles: Shall I open another? Joyce: Do you think we dare? Buffy: As long as you too stay away from the Band Candy, I'm cool with anything. Joyce: You are a demon child.
Next: Forever
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Post by buffyfannumerouno on Apr 17, 2007 16:41:00 GMT -5
Giles: I can always use a hand. Anya: But you have a hand. A paid hand! A hand that isn't the hand of illegal child labor. Giles (pointedly): Anya... Anya (to Dawn): But of course, it's wonderful that you find doing my job so distracting. I am unthreatened. Proceed.
Next: Intervention
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Melissa
Rogue Demon Hunter
I'm gonna be a fireman when the floods roll back.[Mo0:16]
Posts: 428
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Post by Melissa on Apr 17, 2007 19:02:24 GMT -5
Buffybot: Oh Spike, devour me! Spike (rolling onto her): Alright. Buffybot: Spike, I can't help myself! I love you! Spike: You're mine, Buffy. Buffybot: Should I start this program over? Spike: Shh! No programs, don't use that word. Just be Buffy.
Next: Tough Love
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Post by buffyfannumerouno on Apr 18, 2007 8:22:40 GMT -5
Xander: A watched customer never buys. Anya: They would if they were patriotic. Xander (to Willow): Okay, I'm going in. (Then to Anya) Patriotic? Anya: Yes. I've recently come to realize there's more to me than just being human. I'm also an American. Giles: Yes, I suppose you are, in a matter of speaking. You were born here โ your mortal self. Anya: Well, that's right, foreigner. So I've been reading a lot about the good ol' us of a, embracing the extraordinarily precious ideology that's helped to shape and define it. Willow: Democracy? Anya: Capitalism. A free market dependent on the profitable exchange of goods for currency. A system of symbiotic beauty apparently lost on these old people. Look at 'em โ perusing the shelves, undressing the merchandise with their eyeballs. All ogle, no cash. It's not just annoying, it's un-American. Giles: Appalling. Almost as if they no longer think money can buy happiness. Anya: Totally un-American. Oh, and you know what else is un-American? French people. Willow: You don't say? Anya: From what I hear, they don't tip. Now, French old people, that's really the bottom of the barrel, you know? Xander: Ahn, how's about we try being a bit less prejudiced and a bit more inclusive? Not us (gesturing to himself and Willow), just you.
Next: Spiral
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drufan
Initiative Soldier
Posts: 396
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Post by drufan on Apr 18, 2007 15:25:55 GMT -5
Talking about how to kill Glory:
ANYA: Piano! XANDER: Because that's what we used to kill that big demon that one time! No wait, that-that was a rocket launcher. An, what are you talking about? ANYA: We should drop a piano on her. Well, it always works for that creepy cartoon rabbit when he's running from that nice man with the speech impediment
NEXT: The Weight of the World
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